Are You an Olympian?

I remember a line from a movie or cartoon “may I be excused, my brain is full.” Something is bothering me but I can't explain what, exactly. It’s feels similar to looking at distant, faint stars at night. You know the ones--those that you can only see when you don’t look directly at them. So you look at another nearby area of the sky to actually see your target. Then the frustration, as you attempt to show someone else the constellation—you tell them not to look at the place they need to look, to see the place you want them to see.

I suppose it’s the atmosphere of extremes that surrounds us in the world today. The Olympics is a case in point. Who isn’t amazed by the impossible drive, training, and accomplishments of these athletes? These people have achieved extraordinary accomplishments. Yet, the Olympics tend to make me very uncomfortable. I’m sure it’s partially out of personal jealousy. I’ve never felt the desire to narrow my focus on one activity for so long that I could come close to the dedication, determination, and resulting phenomenal performance of these gladiators of athletics. But, for me there is also a very real sense that we are setting ourselves up for constant disappointment, if we pattern our daily life after the Olympians’.

First of all, not everyone will excel at something, just because they want to, have a positive attitude, and work really hard at it! I know I just contradicted the entire self-help community in one broad stroke of the pen. However, no matter how hard a 5 footer practices, he’s not going to play basketball in the NBA. There are just some things that can’t be overcome with a positive attitude.

Secondly, how many of us have the will, means, or time to drop nearly every other thing in life and dedicate years to running, jumping, swimming, or throwing something? Most of us living a ‘normal’ life are routinely choosing to compromise with the extreme opportunities of life. We take that job because it doesn’t require us to travel away from family so much, even though the other job pays more. We pick a home because the schools are better, but the taxes are higher than in the other county, or it is farther away from parents.

Please don’t assume I’m suggesting we accept mediocrity. Quite the contrary! I know we were intended to be great, successful, and joyful. I worry that we are using the wrong rulebook and scorecard to measure greatness, success, and joy. Certainly, money has shown itself to be a deceitful, merciless master. If wealth and fame bring happiness, then why are there so many miserable, addicted, and insecure superstars? Why do we reward a sports personality with the accolade of ‘hero’ and lavish attention and wealth on him, while the schoolteacher is an afterthought in our society; poorly paid, and barely respected. Which one contributes more to societal success?

Let’s not even talk about ‘beauty’. Our society is paranoid schizophrenic. We tell ourselves not to be vain and superficial, yet we spend $ billions on creams, pill, injections, diets, exercises, clothes, and surgery, in a feeble attempt to turn back time, or change our physical condition to match some mysterious definition of beauty. Wrinkles and sagging are a natural part of life. Sure that old guy on the infomercial looks 20-something. And yes, that woman has the smoothest skin ever. No, a wrinkle will not ruin your life, or cause your husband to leave you. Your balding and/or graying head will not cause your wife to be ashamed—if you married some one who has not been fooled by the false scorecard. Yes, you have a responsibility to stay healthy—proper exercise, diet, and sleeping. Chasing the extremes will only bring exhaustion, disappointment, and poverty.

Let’s learn to find happiness in sitting on the porch watching a sunset, in addition to the occasional expedition to bungee jump from a perfectly good bridge. It can be just as memorable to ride a canoe down a local river, as it is to take a cruise in the Caribbean. It’s not wrong to do the big spectacular things. It’s also not right to believe the big things will bring us joy. Perhaps this is the reason so many marriages crumble—the expectations of a steady, unending environment of blissful, trouble-free, existence. If not, well something must be wrong with my spouse, our vacation choice, our job, neighborhood, friends, children, lack of children, parents, grandparents, in-laws, church…. Could it be we’ve lost sight of the accomplishment in overcoming a challenge together, learning to compromise, looking for reasons to be happy, instead of searching for flaws?

We won’t all be Olympians. In fact, very few ever will. We can be champions in life, family, profession, and relationships. Throw away the extreme games of life and search for a friendly pickup game, and have fun! By the way, next time you’re out at night, show someone the constellation Pleiades.